Listen to them. Ask people to listen to you. For example, say "Terry could you listen to me - I've got something I want to tell you?" If a person looks distracted when you're speaking to them, call attention to this distraction.

Sometimes people are unaware that they're day dreaming. Realise that some people will not be able to listen to you at a level you want them to. This can be for a variety of reasons that you have no control over.

 

Plan to listen to these people in this way. Think of flagging a time limit for your listening at the start of the interaction. If a person is repeatedly coming to speak to you without invitation, greet them, access the nature of what they want to speak about and then you could say something like this. "I see, x I've got five minutes here, go ahead and tell me about it".

When five minutes are up, indicate perhaps with a body gesture that you have to exit the conversation.

Of course if you didn't have five minutes say that, or say you can't talk at this time, but can at another time. At some point with the person who repeatedly comes to speak to you uninvited, you might want to sit down with him or her, and with care, tell them how you feel about them constantly coming to speak to you.

From this interaction you could work out a mutually agreeable system for your interactions.

Begin by understanding the Mind & Mood of your audience, and the Result you want to achieve at the end of the presentation.

For selling presentations, consider this scenario for understanding the mind of the key decsion maker.

Project yourself forward in time and imagine that you've already delivered your presentation, and that you've won the piece of business. Now imagine you could listen in on a conversation between the key decision maker and one of his/her colleagues.

The colleague asks the decision maker, "Why did you choose to go with x (your company)? What would the decision maker say? . . . He/she would probably give a one or two sentence response.

The point of this scenario for you is to understand what reason the decision maker would give his colleague for choosing you. Knowing that, tailor and hone your presentation to focus on that very reason.

When you speak the sound of your voice passes through the air outside of your mouth and to your ear through air conduction. It also vibrates at the level of your vocal folds which are housed in your voice box, and passes through bones in your neck to your inner ear through bone conduction.

You hear your voice through two channels, air and bone. When you hear your voice on an audio tape you're only hearing it through the air. That's why it can sound differently to you. What you hear on the audio tape is what other people hear when you speak.

 

Think of the acronym TAP. T. stands for Take Time and develop Self-Trust A. is for Audience and P is for Practice.

(The steps below should be used when you believe you know how to respond to a questioner. They should not be used to bluff your way out of a difficult situation. When you clearly do not know an answer, admit it.)

Firstly I'll elaborate on the T. that is, Take Time and develop Self-Trust. When you're put on the spot and someone asks you a difficult question, take time. This means you should take time by drawing in a breath much more slowly than you normally would. A slow breath can take up to two seconds and you can use that time to organise your thoughts.

Take time by initially speaking at a moderately slow speed. When you gain more confidence you can speed up. Take time by slowing down your body movements and gestures. If you're seated and are required to stand prior to responding, move from a seated to a standing position slowly.

These techniques will calm your mind and better allow you to access the information you need.

Develop self-Trust means to use positive self-talk in the moment to encourage your mind to find the ideas. One useful phrase to say silently to yourself is 'YOU CAN DO THIS'.

The A. in TAP is for 'Audience'. Use the Audience as appropriate to the situation. You can ask the person who asks a question to repeat the question. You can use part or the entire question in your answer.

For example, If someone asked me, "Tell me what causes stuttering?" I could answer, "Max, the answer to what causes stuttering is not well understood. However . . .etc"

You can also have a member of the audience answer the question before you do. When someone asks a question of you, simply say, "Before I respond does anyone else have a point of view on this question?" After the other person has responded you can give your answer.

The keys to doing this step is to firstly know if it is appropriate or inappropriate to allow another person to answer a question directed to you. Secondly, widen your field of vision of the audience and look for people who seem keen to respond.

By allowing others to respond you share the power of the front of room or presentation space, and you'll be perceived as more confident and composed by allowing others to give their point of view.

You can also decline to answer a question if it is more appropriately answered at another time in your presentation. If you choose to tell the questioner you'll answer at a later time, make sure you do or you'll lose your credibility. Don't defer answering a question because you don't know the answer. As previously stated if you don't know the answer to a question, admit that you don't know. Then genuinely offer to find out the answer and get back to the person.

The P. in TAP is for Practice. Before an important presentation or meeting have one or two of your colleagues fire questions at you, which you might be asked in the meeting. Use the above techniques as your answer the questions.

Whenever you practice be sure to practice aloud. Your body needs to hear and feel your voice and words and body language in a practice situation in order to give it confidence to respond confidently in a live situation.

Develop your identity as a successful seller of appointments. Your identity is who you believe you are. Your identity will ultimately determine your long term conversion success in selling appointments. Your identity underpins your day to day calling behaviour in the following manner.

Your identity determines your beliefs. Statements that begin with "I am . . ." are identity statements. For example, an identity statement " I am someone who can win appointments" determines your belief about that behaviour ie. "I believe that I can win more appointments."

Your beliefs in turn determines what you value. For example, 'I value selling appointments." Your values determine your competencies. That is, you become competent at things that you value.

Finally in the development chain, your competencies determine your day to day behaviours. That is, if you develop competence in selling appointments, your day to day behaviour will reflect this, resulting in more sold appointments.

Begin developing your identity with positive self-talk statements beginning with "I am . . ". Keep a diary of successfully sold appointments or victories to refer back to when you're having a difficult day. I have a 'MY WINS' page at the back of my diary with dated entries of my wins. Some entries are small wins, others are large, but all help me in building my identity.

Stereotypes are useful to give a general overview of people from a certain culture. Stereotypes can be dangerous when interacting with a specific person from a different culture. This is because individuals from a culture may display a wide range of behaviours that differ from the cultural stereotype.

It's useful to think about stereotypes in this way. When interacting with a person from another culture, use the stereotype as a background for your interaction. However realise that this individual person may have behaviour significantly different from the cultural stereotype.

For example, a stereotype of Americans is that they have loud voices. However, some Americans are very quiet. When you interact with an individual American be aware of the American stereotypes, but also be aware that this particular American might not fit the stereotype.